A crust had formed upon the snow
A weighty blanket pressing down
While soil and roots cradle deep
Around the shell in which you sleep
It made you seem much further still
As I mused and mourned a while
The joy of you would warm the day
Whether frigid air – or hearts – dismay
Green and red push through the white
Defying viral winter’s bite
Of course, we should expect no less
From a woman’s warm intent to bless
You delight in light of Love
With saints before and saints to come
Think nothing of the woes below
Or the one who stands out in the snow
I wrote this the morning after cleaning my father’s house. I stopped by my mother’s grave. I struggle with winter – always have. It’s that recurring cycle of death before life…or life before death. Either way, it always comes. There’s comfort in that, I suppose, even if it is difficult. Of course, I know Mother has had her last winter and is eternal life – the cycle at a glorious end.
Someone may read the last line and say, “but Tom, she sees you and is with you and is smiling down you.” That’s a nice sentiment, but I don’t believe it…and I’m not mad about it. If I were in the presence of the almighty God of eternity – the Lord and Savior who won my salvation, face-to-face with angels and archangels and all the company of heaven, walking streets of gold, seeing long lost relatives and the men and women of God’s people from creation to today…I think I would be pretty busy. Why would I want to trouble myself with the world when I finally KNOW that God has it all in His hands, including the lives of those I love so dearly? He is so much more than me. Let me step out of the way so that HIS smile is upon you!
I hope Mother is not paying one lick of attention to the fiascos I create for myself, or the loopiness of our world. Even the best of what we have doesn’t come close to what she’s experiencing. I know when she got to heaven, God said, “Well done, good and faithful servant,” and she was on her way to an eternity of joy.
Meanwhile, we have our moments in the snow. Cold. Lost. Weighed down. Yep, there’s a bit of sadness in that last verse. We’ve all been there, I think. But those pops of color that come through remind us of joy we had, joy we have, and the joy to come. Grace. Mercy. Love. Faith. All goodness.
a tilting of air 